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How to Obtain a Restraining Order and Victim's Restitution for Financial Loss and Damages

Obtaining a temporary restraining order (TRO) is an important step in protecting victims of domestic violence and stalking. This order is an acknowledgment by the court system that a person is dangerous to you, and by law, they cannot approach you or visit your home or place of work. Once the order is served to the abuser, any contact they make with you is considered a violation of the TRO.

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Individuals should report violations to the police, who will complete an incident report and send it to the court. The court will then set a date for the abuser to appear, during which they may be charged for the violation(s). The district attorney’s office will represent the victim in the case unless they appoint their own lawyer.

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Although a TRO serves as legal protection, it may not deter the abuser from further violence and stalking, and the individual must take other measures of protection.

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Tips for getting a restraining order and victim's restitution

  • Track the history of abuse. Keep a master list of incident report numbers.

  • Take screenshots of abusive messages and records of phone calls. Save all voicemails.

  • Document damage to shared and personal property with photos. Track a list of expenses due to damages:  item, date, cost, photos, and repair receipts.

  • Organize all of your documents and keep them together and hidden from the abuser.

  • Go to the local courthouse to file a restraining order. Try to go early in the day, as it might take several hours to apply for and process the order. Bring food and water if you can and plan to be there for a while. Dress nicely, take deep breaths, and be as calm and courteous as possible as you may work with multiple clerks, lawyers, and law enforcement officers to complete the process. Do not be discouraged! You’re doing the right thing!

  • Find the civil business department within the courthouse or ask someone to direct you to where to file for a restraining order.

  • Bring all evidence that you have of abuse (texts, phone calls and messages, photos of damages, etc.). They might not record some of it, but that doesn’t make your experience invalid.

  • Be ready to share your story with a lawyer who will type it up for the judge. Focus on describing the times that you felt your abuser put you in physical danger.

  • Follow through with any instructions the courthouse clerks give you. Write down what they tell you.

  • Request that the sheriff’s department serve the temporary restraining order papers. Be prepared to give them an address and time of where to find the abuser.

  • Once you have it, make multiple copies of the restraining order and keep one in your home, in your car, and saved on your phone to show law enforcement whenever needed.

  • Document and report every restraining order violation. This will help build your case and help the court pursue charges.

  • File an incident report every time you feel threatened or the abuser violates the restraining order. Let the police officers know that you want to press charges when you file an incident report.

  • Prepare a victim’s statement describing the damages caused by the abuser. Notify the district attorney’s office that you want to file for victim’s restitution to be repaid for damages.

  • Be sure to check your mail and follow through with any instructions given to you by the district attorney’s office or the court.

  • Speak with your employer’s human resources person, if you have one, and let them know the days of work you’ll miss due to court dates. Many states and companies are legally required to provide time off for domestic violence victims to take steps to protect themselves.

  • Include any days of missed work that were unpaid in your victim’s restitution list of damages and financial loss.

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